I’ve been thinking about how to write this post, for the last three weeks and have decided there is no way to tip toe around this. I have always been transparent on my blog, so I’m just going to dive in.
I quit my job.
I left a high salary and my position as Director of my Department. This was not an easy decision for me. However, it was one that I felt in my soul needed to be made.
Let me start by telling you, that I am a very loyal person. Many of my long term followers are aware that my loyalty knows no end, with my relationships and my job. Think “El Chapo’s Wife” being questioned on his activities and her claiming she wasn’t aware her husband was a criminal. That is the type of loyalty, I’m talking about. Get the picture?
I dedicated myself and worked my ass off for a company that I LOVED for almost four years. I was loyal and turned a blind eye to things that indicated early on, I would not fit in well. However, I stayed because it was a steady income for me when I was a single mom of four and I thought maybe things will get better. I worked hard and reached my goal of being the youngest Director for the company, running my own department and reporting directly to the President. However, I started to see a change in who I was becoming – at work and at home and I didn’t like this new person. I spent many days at work crying because of the pressure and unspoken expectations. To put it bluntly, it fucking broke me. I was so confused, this was my goal why the hell was I not happy?! After much soul searching, I realized my happiness needed to come from within, but in that environment I would never be happy.
At the end, I had to decide what mattered to me more, the job or my well being. I decided that the dream I had of being a Director wasn’t worth my family or my health. I had to remind myself, “Girl, you are worth so much more than this.” And while it was a difficult decision, I am so happy I made it.
I missed my children, more than anyone can understand. The joy I get from seeing them get off the bus every afternoon is something I can’t explain. I used to leave my home at 7am and not get home until 6pm, daily just to meet the work deadlines. I worked an average of 52.5 hours a week and barely saw my kids! I was working myself to death, I realize that now and no amount of money is worth sacrificing my health or my time with my babies! I don’t intend to enter the corporate world right away. Instead, I’m taking time to focus on my kids and my husband.
So I want to share with those of you who are struggling with a situation that you’re not happy with. Remember, to trust your intuition. If you feel like something is not right, do not ignore that feeling. Speak up, don’t lose your voice! Don’t sacrifice your health for a job that will replace you tomorrow. No matter how you may feel about your job, the employees, or how loyal you are; all employees are replaceable. So I urge you not to put off your goals because of that 9 to 5 job, instead make your goals a priority!
I’m telling you that your worth does not lie in your job title or how much money you make. So work on that vision board, you’ve been putting off. Sign up to take a course, to learn something new, completely for yourself, just because you can! Build the blanket fort with your kiddos! Do something today, your future self will thank you for.
You only get one life to live, live it to your fullest and don’t limit yourself because you, my friend, are worth it!